People like to ask what I'm working on at the moment and I tell them I'm taking it slow, testing the knee, and moving forward with the idea of running a marathon in Dallas or Las Vegas in April.

Then they say: "No, moron, what are you writing?"

Ohhhh, well I have two projects in different phases of undress at the moment.

One is a novel tentatively titled "Pet Teachers." It is done in rough draft, beginning to end, but still needs some beefing up. PT is currently on the back burner and in the hands of my crack editorial team, who will point out flaws, mock me, say "you call that writing?", and then will return it, hopefully in a month or two, with some ideas on how I can fine tune it, rewrite it, and turn it into a Pulitzer Prize winner or at least something that won't get me laughed out of the Sturgis Fine Arts Club.

In a nutshell, "Pet Teachers" follow three South Dakota teachers and their criminal activities. I'd tell you more, but somebody would likely steal this highly clever idea. Trust me, it'll be fun.

The project that currently has me plunkin' the keyboard is tentatively titled "Zoo Falls." I'm on a pretty good roll with this one, maybe about a third done, but pretty much fully outlined. It's looking a little more PG-13 than most stuff I write, but I think it's got the most potential to crack you up.

ZF features a homeless dude named "Juicy" in Sioux Falls. He knows the city better than anyone, including the mayor, city council, state's attorney, cops and firemen. It soon becomes apparent that Juicy is about the only one in town with any morals. I'm liking this one a lot.

When will either of these be finished? Good question. I'd like to release one in 2012. But there's a pretty good chance a marathon, three kids and a real job, could delay that. Stay tuned.